It's a been a hectic week, no?
I hope this week I can take a little break. Although of course, kahhow and Liks will soon put an end to that cho! =D
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I don't have a crush.
Or a girlfriend, a steady, or whatever.
When someone poses me the eternal question: are you attached? (Dammit, it sounds like those cheesy drama flicks "Are you married yet? When can I have my son? Can have sex faster or not?") I can answer with absolute honesty "no".
And although I do not disclose all of my secrets on my blog; I really do not have a crush.
I find this gives me a high advantage in the occasional Truth or Dare games where the main topic is either this or cucumber-fetishism.
[Actually, I don't get it... The people who have crushes seems to have leaked out the info to the rest of the world, except for me.]
This isn't a matter of uhm, say, enforced decision, or parental regulations... it's by choice, and there is logic behind it (namely, no one wants me. xD)
I'm not complaining. Not at all. In fact, with my paranoia as it is, it's probably for the better, because she will either drive me insane, or vice versa, or both. I'm already having personal trouble with my normal relationships as it is. Although it's probably all just in my mind. [I hope.]
Then again, if I actually do decide to settle down in a relationship, it has to be God-directed, because I'm damn sure it isn't going to happen as things are now.
I have nothing personal against those who do have crushes. The problem with it is that it sometimes brings so much heartbreak. Or maybe it's just the sentimental me. Then again, it is true for most that it does bring happiness while it lasts, and even if it doesn't, the two parties still can have a very fufilling normal relationship. Crushes, after all, are by definition temporary.
It's human nature to seek love. Without God, it just ends up in all the wrong places, no?
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And for those who ask, I like Chomesuke as a fictional character, so that doesn't count.
2 comments:
Perhaps heartbreak leads into the heart of God. Heartbreak teaches the transiency and shallowness of human love--it spurs us to thirst for something more. Heartbreak is the judge that condemns us, the voice that tells us that our love is egotistic, that we wish to receive and not to give. Heartbreak is the angel of the Way, for it gives us a chance to love, even when we are not loved.
The seeker who yearns for Love is blessed with painful shatterings. The Prince of Peace is the One most heartbroken. Christ loves most when he is hanging on a Cross.
The failing of human love is... unfortunately, natural. As much as human love is, even human love fails.
I believe that God doesn't give you heartbreak. What's the point? And where does all this pain come from? Certainly not God. Guess who?
Human love is selfish, no matter how you look at it. But when you draw from God's inexhaustable love, then you can find it to love others. We love, after all, coz He first loved us, when we were still so imperfect.
There is a higher Judge than that of people and people's wavering love. And because of His love and what He did, He declares you not guilty - not because of what we did or didn't do, but all because of Him and what He did.
Only God's love can remain. And thankfully, willingly, lovingly, He always does.
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